Writers' Block 3

How do you think personal relationships would change if people could read minds?

OMG. People would hate me if they could read my mind. I keep certain things to myself for a reason. But in some cases it might not be the worst thing, if you could turn the ability on and off...

I'm not really sure how this would work, because I wouldn't want people knowing all my thoughts about them or about other people. I wouldn't want him to know, and I'm sure my boyfriend wouldn't want to know when I thought other people were attractive. Likewise, I don't care that he finds other women attractive if a. he doesn't tell me all the time and b. if he doesn't act on it. That's the whole "don't tell me what celebrities you find hot" thing, if you've ever seen that thing going around the internet about boys and girls.

People just should never read each other's minds... That would be horrible for people. There are things going on in my head that I would never tell anyone, and if I did I would play it off as a joke. Like some of the things I say on twitter before remember people actually read it. Except I don't play that off as a joke, because nobody ever questions the things I say on twitter. Even when I mention possible 3-somes or 4-somes... :-O

Excitement!

I was given a great opportunity today! I get to interview for a chance to fill the Academic Peer Advisor position that opened up because an RA was fired and an APA filled that position! I am just so excited for another chance because a friend told a member of ResLife staff that I would do a good job as an APA. :)

I was going to keep my ears open for any time a position opened up so I could contact the head of ResLife, and I was going to email him at some point today. Instead, I got a call from the Resident Director of the complex I lived in last year saying I was recommended and to call/email her if I was interested to set up an interview. Yaaaay! I was even going to attempt to apply again in spring, but instead of for an RA job, for an APA job... so this is pretty cool.

The pay is not as much, but the job does not require as much as my time, either. Plus, I got the job within the Athletic Department, where I should make some alright money through, as well! Life seems to be really positive today. Ummm yaay! Awesome because I have had some negative feeling days lately.

I'm watching football, I don't have a lot of homework left so it's okay. And since I'm too excited, I will need something to do when I can't sleep. Hahaha.

Disadvantages of the APA job: No fridge, microwave, or stove.

But I have friends with those things...

LJ Writer's Block 2

Have you ever had a teacher who made a profound difference in your life? How did they influence and/or inspire you?

I usually have really good relationships with most of my teachers. Usually ones in the Science department. I don't give teachers a hard time and I am a pleasant student. I think there are many teachers I've had that influenced my life or inspire me. My Environmental Science teacher in high school, Mr. Gain, was inspiring for sure. I took his class after being a part of the Conservation Club for a couple year, he was the "head advisor." I learned so much in his class that I didn't already know about the environment. I wanted to do something with my life that can change the things that didn't sit right with me. Because of his class, I decided to continue with Environmental Studies in college and I'm really excited to learn as much as I can in the topic. Even though I have heard it can get pretty depressing, I think I can do it because I am not fully unaware of what goes on in the world, and I am not as shockable as others.

Another teacher that was influential was my Chemistry teacher in high school. He had cancer and he fought through the final year of his life. He did not miss very many days my senior year, and that is really inspiring because he fought so hard and was just such a great teacher. He also had a lot of faith in me through my junior and senior year. I was not one to always turn my stuff in on time, but he still thought I was capable of doing both; AP Chemistry and Accelerated Physics. I know that he had a lot of students through his career, but I also know that he was really good at getting to know as many of them that wanted to get to know him. If I believed in Heaven and all that, I know he would be watching us proudly. And writing this is getting REALLY emotional, I miss him so much!

From LiveJournal "writers block"

How do you feel about public versus private schooling?

If it gets the "job" done, it really doesn't matter to me where you were schooled. It also depends on the level. I have never been to a private institution, so I cannot properly judge this. I have a friend who went to a Catholic(?) school for K-8 and she is now at a private college, and she's a great person. The reason for this is because she is one of those people who doesn't just ACCEPT what people tell her is true. This could be dangerous for people who do not question anything they're told. There was also a case in elementary school where this girl was new to my class from a Catholic school, and she did not know how many feet were in a yard as a 6th grader!?

Basically, if I was going to spend the money on sending my child to a private school, I would be very involved to make sure they were getting the "better" quality of schooling that I would expect for the money I'm shelling out. I do not understand spending that kind of money for something that is equal, and possibly worse, compared to a public education.

I don't think it matters where someone goes to school, what really matters is how the individual feels at a particular place. I would not personally send my child to a private school, unless they made that choice on their own. I do not think there is anything superior about private schools compared to public school, until the class sizes in a public school make it hard for a student to get proper help if they actively look for help but are not getting it.

Ummms

Some people really really REALLY only think of themselves. Hey, if you're going to see someone you miss so so so bad, that's great for you, but realize that you don't really have the need to say it 300 times a week. A couple hours away is a lot shorter than literally an entire DAY worth of driving away. Yeah.. OMG. If you miss someone who lives a few hours away your options of seeing them are much easier than my ability to see people who live three states away! Shush your face(book) about how much it sucks not being able to see someone when if you really wanted to, you could leave after class on Friday and spend the weekend home. Whatever. It's all my fault for getting involved with someone even after I knew I was going so far away for school, I guess.

Natural Burials

The last couple days I have done a little bit of research into what is called "natural burials" It's pretty interesting.

For more information you should go to this site, or check out the wikipedia page on it. I don't want to really explain it right now, and both places could do a MUCH better job.

Dear 3rd Semester,

I'm done with you, already. Or at least I wish that were true! I don't like most of my classes, and after this semester I get to load myself with Environmental Studies and Psychology course work. Then I'll actually be interested in the classes I'm taking. Wooo! (Except the ones involving math, gross, required stats class).

Having pre-calc 4 days a week is annoying and draining.

Having to listen to the most annoying woman talk for my mass media class. Annoying. I only took this class to finish off my GenEd classes this semester.

Psychology is awesome. I enjoy lecture.

Philosophy class might be tricky at times but enjoyable. Finishes my GenEds.

Biology Lab. Finishes off my GenEds in the science. yay! (I need this to be done before advancing in MANY of the ENVS courses.)

Ummmmmmmmm. I don't have enough to occupy my time, even when my job starts. My job will be pretty much only weekends so maybe I'll get another part time job in town to take up more of my time?! I don't know. We'll see. I don't want to take on too much this semester because next semester I'll have more credits, and more homework. I should have taken another psychology class this semester, I had room in my schedule for it. Oh well.

I am much further in finishing the psych program than I am the envs program, and ENVS is my major. I still haven't declared psych... weird. (actually they're about equal until this semester is over).

Dreams?

If I remember, I should start posting my dreams here. Like brain-dreams, not like goal-dreams... ya dig?

I have some wild dreams, and remember them pretty well but I don't have anywhere to keep them. Which is unfortunate because I find dreams interesting... so keeping them written down somewhere would be nice.

Error. Error.

It seems like whenever I actually have something decent to put here, there is an error with blogger.

Life is going alright and I still don't have anything to say that will gain me more people reading my blog in order to make some extra money off it.

I have two weeks left in WI and I think I might be getting a little stressed about that. I have to hang out with people still and clean my room up and pack it up. Ian and I have to clean his giant closet so I can put my stuff in there so it isn't in my parents' house anymore for people to dig through!! Plus I don't really stay there when I'm in WI, anyway, unless Ian is working from 7am-10pm (two jobs).

After packing my WI life up again, I get to sit in a car for about two or three days with my mom and my brother. Woohoo?! We're leaving the 18th but I don't know what time we're leaving, and I can move into my on-campus apartment the 20th.

All the rest of summer took sooo long and now it is going much faster than I would like it to be going. I'm happy Ian has some days completely off from work right before I leave, though, so we can do some fun stuff before saying goodbye until October. (I think he's been mentioning coming to visit again this fall, in October). *sigh*

p.s. using facebook makes me so angry at the human population for being so..... ugh!

Dear Blogger

I don't know if I have mentioned it, yet, but I did not get any C's in any of my six classes. woohoo! I was expecting two C's, So that is happy.

I'm going camping this weekend with some cool people, which will be fun. I'm pretty stoked about it, and now I just hope the weather where we are going is nice over the weekend.

The other day I filled out a lot of scholarship related things, and "favorited" a few other scholarships that required more of my time to complete. Longer, more thought provoked essays. Tonight when I'm not at trivia, I shall look back at them and pick one to work on. Or read more Harry Potter 6. I haven't quite decided. (Or as I was typing this, I was told there was room on the trivia team tonight, after all, so that's what I'm going to do... because it's fun). So instead, while I'm home, I'll eat dinner and mint chocolate icecream. mmmmmm.

Even though my money situation is less stressful now that I got the FinAid award letter, I still wouldn't mind some dumb "pays in cash" babysitting or something similar job... ya know? I have nothing to do all day... while everyone else is working.

Job

I need a job for summer.

Ugh.

Money is very stressful to me, and that's like the only major stressor in my life.

What can I write about next time, so I can attract more viewers? If I start getting tons of viewers I can make money off my blog because of google adsense.

Halp?!

year one... almost done!

I am stoked to be done with the first school year, but not quite as stoked to be going back to 'stallis...

It's not that I don't miss people, it's that I don't miss the city life... ugh. Oh well. I'll live, most likely. :)

See ya soon, Wisconsin!

Speech

I didn't end up finishing my speech and having it ready for today, but since the paper is due friday I'm going to have the outline finished for Thursday (and maybe give my speech thursday if there is time, which there might because we've been getting out early).

I get to register for classes starting friday. yay! The one class I really feel like I need NEED to get into is ENVS 200, writing the environment. I wasn't able to for this semester and it's my "moving forward" step because it's a pre-requisite for many of the rest of the ENVS classes. If i don't get into it for next semester I'm going to see if there is a way to get into it, even if it is full... I don't want to put my ability to take higher level classes in my major on hold because of this. Graduating on time would be nice, ya know?

*sigh* I am kind of glad I didn't rush trying to finish my speech, because now I have a lot of good information... :-P I had a Eureka moment while trying to nap after class (big headache and a lot of sinus pressure, dislike).

Well I'm going to go write a list of what I need completed this week, and then do them in the order I feel will be less stressful... not that I get stressed out often... but I'm kinda close... 7-10 page paper due friday that i didn't realize was due friday... yikes...

Well...

It's the last stretch of the school year. I have papers, speeches, and projects up the butt and it's annoying. On the plus side, after next week I pretty much only have to worry about exams because everything is due this week except a few straggling projects.

I did not get a job as an RA, which was a little disappointing, but the night I found out about not getting the job I had a good time with some great friends. :) I was told to try again next time.

I will be living in an on-campus apartment, possibly by myself if there aren't enough female transfer students. I don't know when I find out about that, but I'm praying to every non-existing god-like thing that I don't end up with a roommate next semester. LOL. Having an entire apartment to myself would be awesome, especially since I would pay the same not matter if I had a roommate or lived alone. :D

Well I need to type up my outline for my 10 minute speech tomorrow, so I shouldn't waste too much more time writing up a blog. Also, I have nothing left to say....

~Amanda

Myspace

I no longer use myspace so I started saving my pictures and blogs to my computer... deleting it would be faster if I didn't want to keep these things! Oh well...

Less than 6 weeks until summer. I spent spring break back in WI, and that was okay. Spent a lot of time with my boy... it was fun. We played Mario Party 2, two nights in a row. :)

My mom made a few meals for me, that was cool!

I find out any day now if I got a job as an RA or not!

There is probably more, but I'm not procrastinating on homework, so oh well...

Midterms, etc.

This week I am rather busy with midterms and I cannot wait for this week to be done! I want to do well in my classes so I have been studying for real. I studied history of psychology for 2 hours today. Then I watched MOST of The Swan Princess... be jealous! :) But that boy called me near the end so I talked to him before he went to midnight sports.

I have a speech to give on Thursday, but if I do not finish writing my outline I'm sure I can convince my teacher to let me go next week... he is pretty flexible and understands students sometimes get a LOT on their plates. I need to do really well on 2 of my exams this week. Especially anthropology because we have a midterm and a final that is all the stuff we learn in the semester, plus a couple projects... not very many graded things in that class at all! :-O

I had an interview today for a position in Residents Life (RA/APA).. I am hoping for a RA job, but I would be fine with any kind of "for sure" job going into next semester. We won't find out if we have a job or not until after spring break. I lost my belt for my coat between my interview and getting back to my dorm room.

I'm pretty excited about spring break though... Yes, I'm going back to Wisconsin, but I do miss a few people... so it's okay. And my dog might have babies while I'm home! Coming home the 12th late at night and getting back to Gunnison mid-day on the 21st. haha :D

Over summer my goal is to get my drivers' license and a reliable enough vehicle so I can drive myself to/from school. Yes it's a long drive, especially alone, but being able to leave for winter/summer break on my own terms is kind of worth it.. instead of relying on others. Plus I could probably do the trip in less than breaking it up in 2 days if I'm motivated. After CO, until IL the speed limit is like 70-75 so if it's like early morning when I'm driving through there it won't be bad, traffic-wise... ya know? I haven't thought hard about this, but I HAVE put some thought into it...

Well, I really do need to head to bed because I have an exam in the morning I need to be well rested for. I hope my posts can be more positive from now on, but you know... everyone just has those "down" days... :-/

I feel like a kid with extremely low self-esteem right now, and I want to cry.

It doesn't help that I was looking a pictures of real life women who are really pretty and really sexy and not just CUTE. I don't look my age, and my skin hates me.

I'm socially awkward more times than I am not.

I'm dating someone who treats me really well and I don't feel like I deserve it.

I'm on the verge of tears right now. :(

I like this paper...

Ideas and Beliefs

Sitting in class listening to students speak, it is clear everyone has different ideas of what is true. As original as people want their beliefs and ideas to be, it is easy to argue that they have been influenced by surroundings in some way. Just as well, everyone thinks what he or she believes is the truth but with about six and a half billion people on Earth that is a lot of different truths to be told. According to Plato there is one truth that is too unbelievable to the rest of the world and it would be painful, in a sense, to anyone who has learned this truth.

Much of what I understand about the world has come from ideas presented to me by my elders. The people I grew up knowing my entire life had a huge influence on my beliefs, especially my mom who has been the number one person in my life. She influenced me a lot because she was who I saw everyday for a majority of my growing. My family influences me by being the ones who spoke to and around me as a child. Until I was around middle school age, I really didn’t know what to think when it came important life thoughts. Then I started spending less time with family and more time with friends. Spending time with friends who had different ideas really makes you think more about your own ideas. The interactions between friends may even challenge ideas made prior. At this age I started to notice more and more how things weren’t always as I grew up thinking. It was clear that everything around me had some kind of power to shape my own believes.

Even though everything from family to media has the power to shape my beliefs, I think the people I respected the most over the last few years have had the most power. You tend to take more into consideration if someone you have high respect for presents you with information. This could be good if they are informing you on something that they have studied for a long time. It could also be good if it challenges something you are unsure of because it gives you a different perspective of something you might not have known, or know very little about. On the other hand it might not be good because if you take that person too much to heart instead of just using them as a resource you may just take their beliefs totally instead of forming independent thoughts. In order to figure out what is true extensive research and thought needs to be done.

I do not know what is true, but I do think it is a good idea to think about things and question everything, especially if I don’t understand it. As far as a universal truth goes, I don’t think it will ever be possible to know if there is one or not. Either there is not, and anyone trying to figure it out is wasting his or her time or like Plato believed, there is. If Plato were correct I don’t think anyone will ever figure it out because of the time it would take. I also think that if someone does learn of the Truth it would be too hard for them to communicate it in a way for the entire world to understand.

dear friends and family,

2 kids from my school died this weekend. i didn't know either of them. i know for sure i met the girl, and i may have met the guy.

but dear friends and family, please don't be sad about my death... I would rather you be happy about my life.

also, please make sure my ashes are sent in the wind. (Unless I do a "green" burial... thingy).

lastly.... I'm pretty sure we die and then that's the end of our body.... so if you can remember... no praying for me. 1) I'm already dead, so even if there happens to be a god it's not going to bring me back. 2) I'm not sure there is a 2... I'm rather tired though.

Mostly, celebrate my life, and be happy I lived. I mean really that's all we can do.

2009 (it was as messy as this entry)

Overall the year 2009 was a really excellent year:

I got into the school I applied to at the end of 2008.

And it was plausible for me to pay for it which I was most worried about at the time.

I made a new group of friends through Ian randomly inviting me to parties with him and his friends then asking me to join his kickball team.

I played kick ball in spring it was pretty freaking awesome.

Because of kickball I also started playing a decent amount of beer pong... where Ian's sister nicknamed me the silent sniper or something. I'm not really comfortable with drunks driving me home so I started spending friday nights at Ian's and then he'd drive me home in the morning.

Through this we started to like each other so that's cool because now I'm dating him and he treats me really well. And I've become better at trusting people a little more.

We weren't going to do that officially dating thing which confused me because since my mom's wedding I started hanging with him more than once a week. And his friends were like "ummm Ian...?" but yeah with me going away for school it didn't seem like a good idea. Then right before i left we had talked and it went all official..

Then I went away to school.

My mom and grandma drove me to Colorado it was a long drive... especially the second day.

It's really really beautiful in Colorado!

People there are so nice, and laid back... it took me a while to get used to how slow things can be.. (like at restaurants i feel like i'm waiting FOREVER because in Wisconsin service is a lot faster usually otherwise people get cranky).

I have been enjoying it there and can really see myself living in Colorado for a while. But I do want to travel the world! But since I made it to Colorado finally (wanted to go since I was like 10) I know anything really is possible if you put in the effort.

I have been meeting a lot of cool people at my school, and this coming up semester is a chance to meet even more cool people! I'm so excited for school, I've always loved it but this is so much cooler. I have a heavy schedule this semester but I can do it. I got 4/6 As and passed English with a B-... a C+ in Geology lecture but oh well... I'm proud of my first semester, especially since it's been three years since I've been in school.

Ian visited me in Colorado in October, that was really cool... and fun. My mom worried that I wasn't updating my facebook and I blew up on her a little.. but really it just shows that she doesn't even know me. And she was being ridiculous. She was like "well i didn't know if something happened to you or if Ian convinced you to skip class" Ummm whoa mom!

I was busy with school and homework and Ian!! That's a LOT to juggle in a week, especially since I had essays due!! In fact I had PERFECT ATTENDANCE in ALL my classes-thank you very much for your confidence in me, mom...

Anyway the visit was really fun and my friends at college liked Ian and Ian liked them. My family likes Ian, his family likes me... it's all cool, now.

Flew home for the first time. The most anxious parts were any time I was in an airport! for real. The first night home boy had a party at his house. My break has been going well. Haven't seen some of the faces I wanted to see, but that's okay. Still don't have some things done that I wanted to get done before I left... whoopsies. Been busy.

New Year celebration was fun. We all looked good. Drank a really good white bubbly at the end of the night that tasted like grapefruit but not horrible. It was a really good night then since it was Ian's bday too I spent the day with him. First we picked up some people and they all were crazies and jumped into the Lake burrrrr.... did I mention I know some crazies? then we watched the Hangover and napped at his house. Talked for a while after the movie and stuff just relaxing. Since we fell asleep before midnight on the day his sister turned 21 I joked that he was going to fall asleep and miss dinner at his parents' house. Went to his parents' for dinner and video games. Back to his place for movie and sleep. Speed Racer. Going to have to watch it again.

Let's see, to sum it up. 2009 was the best year of my memory, and I can't wait to see what 2010 has in store for me. The good and the bad because no matter what happens it's what makes you who you are. I had a really weak 2008 and a really awesome 2009.

Things I hope to do in 2010:

-No McDonalds (Already don't do Starbucks, Wendy's, and BurgerKing (though out of McDs and BK this year I'd rather do BK)).

-Stay with all 18 Credits for my second semester and get Bs or better in all of them.

-Get a drivers' license.

-Travel to the East Coast.

It's not really much. But I'm better at making short term goals... Like "go to the bank before leaving 'stallis again." haha ;) I need to deposit checks and get quarters for laundry...

Peace Out Kids,

A-skaj